Have you ever had so much going on that you just wanted to cry, laugh maniacally or throw your hands in the air saying "Nah. I give up."? If you haven't, I'd like to meet you and know what your secrets are! That feeling is very cyclical in my life, and lately I've felt like I've been having one extended Jessie Spano moment.
Life has a funny way of getting in the way of...life.
When I was younger, going a million miles an hour was not only exhilarating, but encouraged. Always on-the-go, always up to something. Getting into the blogging game has only compounded my schedule with its various responsibilities. My commitment to health and fitness is yet another layer on top of that, and now my full-time, onsite gig has added a whole new dimension. Working from home spoiled me in many ways, and though I love and welcome this gig, I've been struggling hard with making time for everything. Older and wiser, I know it's not a matter of 'finding work/life balance', but of reorganizing my priorities and recognizing a new phase in my career.
Photo by Emily Shearing
I used to looove being busy. Everyone did, it seemed. Multi-tasking was acceptable. It's like we walked around wearing 'busy' like a badge of honor; an easy way out of sharing too much in a conversation or getting out of things that you don't want to do but know you have to. Somewhere along the line, 'busy' became synonymous (to me anyway) with 'procrastinating', 'running away from responsibilities' and 'bullshit.'
There are things we have to do so we can do the things we want to do, and if we're lucky enough, there might even be some overlap of both. I made the choice to take on a full-time gig to bring some structure to the volatility of consulting, but blogging remains my passion. I also love to work out, preferably in the morning. I've also learned that the perfect counterpart to having a lot of shit to do is to take care of yourself and sometimes, that means doing nothing. Somewhere in the last few weeks, I'd let myself get caught up in the tide of all that I have to do, I was barely doing anything I wanted to. That lights a fire in me. Grounds me. Anchors me.
My anchor; my perfect day involves writing, reading, a great workout, a delicious nap and little to nothing on my calendar. A Beautiful Stephanie with hemp milk from Vivace is icing on top of that cake. It's hard to say 'no' to events, fashion shows, friends and sometimes even family, but it's even harder to come back from saying 'no' to yourself so much that you're no good when you are out in public. If you find yourself complaining a lot, getting grouchy or annoyed easily or that things that should be fun (like happy hour) aren't anymore, then you know what I mean. There are a lot of shiny new toys, things and people to be distracted by out there, and I grow daily in learning how to step back from all of it to nurture myself. No matter how far the tide of life takes me, I am grateful to always find my way back to the shore; to my anchor.
What is your anchor?